Sunday, November 29, 2009

How Happy Feels

Hello my pretties. Miss me?? Come on, you know you did. Well, I know I missed me. I'm better! That's right, better, better than ever, better than before and best of all, a better person. And this on top of being a pretty grand girl to start with.

Sorry for that public display of self-love. I'll try to keep that kind of thing to myself. The store has been so busy this past week. When I look out and see a car at the shop I have this instant rush of panic. I will be a disappointment to them, I'm sure of that. Then that passes and I adjust my underpinnings and prepare to start the show. Such sweet, sweet women come... At first everyone is overwhelmed, too much to see - sensory overload. I want to say. "It's OK. Take small bites and breathe through your eyelids. Sometimes I do say that and I scare them. Its a risk, you know, to let your thoughts out. And when they find that thing that makes them have a happy breath, its pure joy for both of us. They pick up a little piece of possibility and then they imagine something that wasn't there before.... it's creation at its finest. And that, is how happy feels.

That's it for now. I'll be back soon

cheers, Bev

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Room with a View

Great book and great descriptive of my presents circumstances. I, along with the rest of my unit, remain confined to the homestead. THE FLU, that's what we've got. I'm not even going to talk about it. People who want to talk about their sore-throats and about being down with the flu haven't really had THE FLU they've had some lower-case version. People who have had THE FLU do not want to talk about it - they just want to praise Allah and vow to be a better person.

This will be a short and insignificant post. The shop has been busy and I feel like I have main-lined Martha. I have the most incredible urge to create and not just with paper. I want to make checker-board cookies and a wreath and god forbid..... I even want a little tinsel. I swear as soon as I'm feeling better I'm donning an apron and cranking up The Judd's Christmas CD.
Gosh Darn - I'm sick.

And that is what I originally wanted to speak to you about - What's a girl like me to do in our new "hand-sanitizing -mask wearing" reality. I can't keep my hands out of mouth for 2 minutes let alone an entire trip to town. My whole thought process revolves around me chewing on my fingernail. I am doomed. I am the horrible example people speak of. I am going to have to become Mary-Louise Alcott - confined to my room, lowering gingerbread down to the neighbourhood children.

that's all I've got. Don't worry, I'll be fine.

cheer, Bev

Sunday, November 8, 2009

Fear of Clowns

I had this thought that if I'm ever going to stop my arse from growing I may have to implement clown fear. Run, Beverly, run a clown is chasing you. I have a paralysing fear of clowns but no inspirational motive to lose weight. No internal need to strong and fit. I don't have to exercise to feel better, the research team at Pfizer have taken care of that. And let's be realistic - how stunning can my results be? I'm not the bow flex Grannie, I'm the National Geographic Grannie.

Well perhaps I should spend SOME time not talking about myself. The store is lovely, all ready for Christmas. The papers are all nestled into their racks and the ribbons and embellishments are dancing on their heads. I'm in my lounge wear and ready to serve. Lately, there have been some random customers. You know, strangers. They catch me off guard and it takes some doing on my part to stop my heart from pounding and start the show. What are they thinking? What makes them happy? Are they put off by a lounge wear wearing, DP drinking saleslady? Who knows? You just have to do your best and hide the stuff you don't want to sell.

The Christmas papers are lovely.

and that was it....for then she got the flu. when I say she, I mean me

this is 2 weeks later and I still have the flu but I'm going to post this incomplete stream of conscious thought.

cheers, Bev