Monday, July 19, 2010
and it was all mighty western.......
brace yourself evie. its another non-crafting post. honestly, if you people are waiting for tutorials or industry news, i'm probably not your girl. i am most likely what is referred to as "a crafting one-night stand" i take part of that back - the public keeps distracting me with their goofy antics and my pre-menopausal hormones are wrecking havoc with my already fragile attention span. so do you want to hear about the farmer's market and rodeo.... or would you like to hear my thoughts on CHA and aversion to copic markers. one involves nudity and the police. just as i thought..off we go
the farmer's market has been slightly uneventful. sure there's the infighting surrounding table issues. location - location. in case you're not in the know - the place you want to be is against the wall and near the front. and nowhere near the tupperware chick. you absolutely do not want to be in the centre isle. back to back tables. i imagine it to be like general population in prison. except old craft ladies have no tats but they do have lots of gas. i don't mind spreading myself around but i don't do general population - well i might do it intoxicated. you should know this is not the part with the interesting ending. well every saturday involves a bit of trash talking by the ladies. opera whispering about what delores did to get table 3. it sounds boring but if you've got a dp in your hand - it's a teenie bit like dinner and a show.
the whole thing got a bit ramped up during rodeo weekend. we're all supposed to be on our best behavior - personally that translated to my being on time and no dirty talk. sooo we were encouraged to dress the part - you know western wear or period costume (cowboy or hooker). i was given a purple dress to don but i protested "i want to be a cowboy" i whined "i'm ALWAYS the hooker". god, i was pathetic. in the end i got my ass up and wouldn't wear the fetching frock. i went modern day, gender neutral- something for everyone look.
the rodeo parade (that started from the community hall) was your basic 3 float/100 horse variety. the "spotlight" float was entitled - old queens. you know, i can't add anything to that. it's it own little fill in the blank joke. well off the cavalcade went in a blaze of square dance music and intermittent rain. somewhere, eye witness accounts vary, the whole moving spectacle came to unceremonious halt- the pomp police officer leading the procession had to leap from his cruiser to break up a fist fight. the chaos ensued - horse shit everywhere, old queens flailing their scepters. i'm sure we won't make the brochure for small town living. the fight between 2 middle age men was over a parking spot.
trouble took a risque turn later at the local hotel. think towels on the table to soak up the spilled ale kind of hotel. a lady disrobed while riding the mechanical bull. i wasn't there, i can't say how much she had on to begin with. this much from a town of less than 600 people. imagine what we could do with more players.
so you see, my capacity for mature, creative endeavors has been reduced by all this foolishness.