Tuesday, July 6, 2010
I am seduced by the normal - you think I jest? I am intoxicated by normal - hockey moms, blond highlights, ice tea, facebook, acronyms like LOL. it's all a sparkily twirling light show. i watch in amazement as people maneuver through this maze - everyone knowing which behavior, emotion and facial expression goes where. normal people also recognize their kind. you never feel awkward in a crowd. never without your magnetic north. sometimes i get close - let's say a conversation about cleaning windows with newsprint - then i brick up and ask if any words from the newsprint ever randomly get transferred to the glass and how cool that would be. at this point the light goes on for most people, they tilt their head, look at me with a strange mix of pity and annoyance, sigh and move on. At the farmer's market on saturday i was positioned across the aisle from an impressive display of normal. tight perm kind of normal - she was so sweet, i could have wept. it was pretty much love at first sight for me. not track lighting, vest wearing kind of love. the other kind. i spent the better part of the 3 hour tour trying not to scare the bejesus out of her. she spent the entire show crocheting a shopping bag out of beige phentex yarn. and the look on her face - mother mary could not have looked more serene. hopefully she and i will become confidants before the end of the summer - i bet she doesn't even own a freak flag.
i am partaking in two activities right now that pretty much put my mean age at 12. i can't confess, i'm not strong enough
and the dry spell continues. maybe my phentex muse will intercede, maybe i'll start lifting her work.
and and i will be posting an interview soon. real or imagined people want to talk to me